First, thank you so much for your well wishes and sweet messages.  Since no good deed goes unpunished, I am going to describe my IUI. :-)

On Saturday, the husband reported to the andrology lab in our RE’s clinic at 9:00am.  I followed at 10:30am, met him at the lab, and tried to pick up his washed sperm.  Turns out there is some major security surrounding that stuff.  They asked for photo ID to prove that I was who I said I was, and even scanned my license so no one could pretend to be me in the future.  It made me wonder if they have a lot of problems with people intentionally picking up the sperm of other people’s spouses—yikes, I hope not!

After I was released with the sperm in a vial, we were led to an exam room.  An RE (not mine, apparently she wasn’t in) came in, introduced herself, and told me that the washed sperm count was 27.5 million, a bit lower than the 30 million they like to see.  She then explained what she was going to do.  In the interest of pain reduction, at my clinic they start with the smallest speculum and work their way up if they can’t reach the cervix.  They tried the two smallest speculums on me before resorting to the monster they actually had to use.  My husband looked on wide-eyed and later told me: “The size of that thing makes me feel inadequate.  I don’t think I need to be there for that part next time.”  Seriously, how do men make everything about penis size?!

As for the actual insemination, I was told that it feels like a pap smear, but for me, it was worse.  I had pretty severe cramping the whole time and moderate cramping for about 36 hours after—OUCH! 

The RE handed the husband a list of restrictions and told me to stay put for 15 minutes.  Rule-bound person that I am, I had him read me the list of don’ts: no working out for 48 hours, nothing medium or high impact for two weeks.  Oh, well, I guess I will use this opportunity to take a break from my normally demaning workout routine.  I am hoping to keep my protein intake high to maintain what little muscle I have built already.

Next up, I have a beta (blood pregnancy test) on Columbus Day, which is something like day 16 post ovulation.  Since I typically only have a 13-day luteal period, the blood test will probably be more of a confirmation of something I have learned at home, in my conveniently located bathroom fertility lab.