I recently came across this story. While, unlike the author, I would never say that infertility has improved my life, I’d be hard-pressed to argue that it has not changed my perspective in important ways.

First, infertility has made me more grateful for what I have: a great husband and, of course, Poppy. Even in my darkest moments, when a baby was far from a sure thing, IF made me grateful for the strength of my husband and our marriage. What with the husband almost dying a few times already, I think it’s safe to say that we have survived more challenges than your average couple married under three years, even without throwing IF into the mix. IF put some(!) additional strains on our relationship, but also showed us once again how strong it is. As for Poppy, I hope he’ll grow up feeling like the most wanted kid on the planet, because, at least for me, he is. :-)

Second, infertility has made me bitter. (I realize this probably sounds a bit paradoxical when combined with the above, but oh well—I never promised to make sense.) Sometimes I am surprised at the depth and ferocity of my bitterness, as it springs on me at the oddest times. It feels like, since I am going to have Poppy, it should have disappeared by now. And yet, when I hear about an acquaintance who got pregnant right away with twins, or who had a child in the fall “because they planned it that way to coincide with private school admissions”, I can’t help but want to throttle someone.

I’m curious: how has infertility changed you?